Telemarketers suck.
They piss you off to no end and call at the most inconvenient time, when you're home. I like sleeping in late. Heck, who doesn't? What really pisses me off is being woken up by a ringing phone when I'm having a perfectly good sleep. It pisses me off even if my parents wakes me up calling......so you should understand just how much it pisses me off when some telemarketer-loser, a person who I know nothing about and vice versa, wakes me up. And if you've woken me up calling my house, you're in for a treat because I'm especially vicious when I'm groggy.
I don't give a shit who you are or what organization you're a part of, if you're trying to 'sell' me something, you're a telemarketer and I hope you burn in Hell. I've cursed out military personnel wanting to interest me in joining the Army ("Why the fuck are you calling me when you should be doing some shit like protecting our country?! Oh, trying to get new recruits helps in protecting the country? I don't care, shove a rifle up your ass and pull the trigger...and make sure there are live bullets in the cartridge while you're at it!") I've made female telemarketers cry. ("You're a fat cunt that's so skanky that talking to you over the phone is giving me an ear infection! I hope you die!"). I've cursed out charities calling for donations for victims of 9/11 ("What, you find it appalling that I won't offer to a charity for the victims of 9/11? Go fuck yourself! I think American Airlines should change their slogan to 'We will even take you to your office'!"). I've told credit card companies off ("Why don't you go to Starbucks and use the credit card you're promoting and buy yourself a nice hot cup of 'Shut The Fuck Up'!"). I've told a lot of people off on the phone. And you know what? I don't care ONE bit who I'm talking to on the other side. I don't care who the hell I'm offending. If you're trying to 'sell' me anything, you're a telemarketer and I can't stand telemarketers.
I'm sure a lot of you can't stand telemarketers. And to all those people that LIKE telemarketers, I hope you die. Anyway, I assume by now you've ascertained that I don't like telemarketers.
I'm sure a lot of you have animosity toward them like myself. Perhaps you're not as vicious toward them as I am, but I know they annoy you. That's why it's enjoyable to annoy them back. Afterall, they've already interrupted whatever you were doing by calling so you might as well have you fun. The problem though is that not everyone can be as mean spirited as I can. That's understandable. I have an 'asshole switch' that I can turn on an off. Most people can't do that. I guess I'm special^_^
Okay, you can't stand telemarketers but can't bring yourself to be mean-spirited toward them. There are other ways to deal with them, and EXTREMELY effectively at that. I've learned to deal with them in this manner after I grew tired of being mean-spirited to them all the time. Yes, having your fun venting your annoyance toward telemarketers grows old after a while.
While it's very satisfying telling telemarketers to go fuck themselves, the problem is that they will inevitably be calling back at some later date and time. Why do you think you're always getting those 'switch to AT&T' or 'switch to Verizon' or whatever telephone provider telemarketing calls all the time? And let's not forget about those damn credit card calls as well. The problem is that telling a telemarketer off is nothing more than hanging up on them. The only difference is that you get to relieve some of your anger on them before you hang up. When a telemarketer realizes that their 'potential buyer' is not interested, he or she will simply move onto the next number on their list. However, if you rattle them up, it might take them of few minutes to gather their thoughts before they can make their next call. Because of this, it means that you will be called once again sometime down the line.
How do I stop these telemarketer trash from calling me? It's pretty easy if you know what you're supposed to do. Unfortunately, a good majority of you probably aren't aware of this.
An easy way to stop telemarketers from calling you is to tell them to stop calling you. "Tell them to stop calling me? How do I do that? I do tell them not to call me but they still keep calling. Why? What do I tell them?" In order to tell them to stop calling you, you have to request that your number be put on their "DO NOT CALL LIST". Companies soliciting calls need to keep a 'do not call list' and must honor your request should you ever ask them to put your number on their 'do not call list'. I'm not going to go into detail on why they have to, but they do. There are certain kinds of companies that don't have to keep a 'do not call list' like non-profit organizations, but for the most part, by law, the majority of the companies calling must maintain a 'do not call list'.
How do you get them to stop calling you?
When a telemarketer calls and start spouting useless shit you don't care about and whatever deal they are offering you, just interrupt them and say you're not interested in what they have to offer and to put your number on their 'do not call list'. That's it. Still confused? Fine, then say this: "I'm not interested. Please put this number on your Do Not Call List". Say that verbatim. So long as you say 'Put this number on your Do Not Call List', the company can no longer call you for 10 years. Yes, 10 years! If you say 'Please don't call this number again', they can still call you becuase your request wasn't worded correctly.
You need to specifically ask to be put on their 'Do Not Call List'.
Keep in mind that that's just ONE way to stop them from calling you again. There are other ways. If you don't want them to call you in the first place, register your number in the National Do Not Call Registry. Most telemarketers can't call your number if it's in the National Do Not Call Registry. Therefore, register your number right away and prevent thought telemarketers from bugging you down the line. If you don't register your number, you're an idiot. Either that or you like receiving telemarketer calls. But then again, if you like receiving telemarketer calls, you're an idiot to begin with so the point is moot. If you're not an idiot and dislike telemarketer calls, registering your number is a great way to stop telemarketers from calling you.
There are more ways of stopping telemarketers.
You can buy yourself an answering machine, if you haven't already that is. That's a good way to screen for telemarketers. What's cool is that you can actually have your answering machine do the work for you and put your number on their 'do not call list' in a way. Telemarketers don't dial the phone numbers. A computer does. When the computer reaches through to a person on the other side, the call is automatically routed to a telemarketer. If you record a 'out-of-service tone' at the beginning of your answering machine message, it can trick the telemarketers' computers into believing the number really is out of service and thus put your number on its 'do not call list'. The only problem is that it could cause some confusion for friends and relatives calling and hearing that tone if they're not aware of you having done what you've done in the first place. Then again, people should be smart enough to realize that its an answering machine since the phone needs to ring a few times before the answering machine picks up. The tone would occur immediately had the number really been out-of-service.
Telemarketers suck. If you don't like them like I do, then spend the extra time to register your number and tell incoming telemarketer calls to "put my number on your do not call list" and you will eliminate probably around 95% of unwanted calls. I got fed up with receiving 3-4 telemarketer calls on a daily basis and did those two steps. I haven't received a telemarketer call in over two weeks. You'll never eliminate telemarketer calls, but you can sure lessen the frequency of calls.
Register your number in the National Do Not Call Registry and spend a week or so actively picking up EVERY telephone call. If you have an answering machine DO NOT let it answer the call because telemarketers usually hang up and will call again another time, increasing the chance that you might be called while sleeping/napping. Answer all your calls and tell all telemarketers to "put my number on your do not call list". Before long, you will notice the frequency of telemarketer calls will drop dramatically. When the registry kicks in, you will be almost free from telemarketers entirely.
Bye bye you fucking telemarketers. With more people like me around spreading the news on how to stop your unwanted calls, it's only a matter of time before you're out of a job. Good. I hope you find no job after this and end up homeless and eventually die of starvation or cold, whichever first.
To the people who follow my advice and realize that this works, feel free to send me money out of your appreciation of my rant kicking ass so much.^_^